May 2010
December 2009
- Sweet P Rebel Headquarters
June 2009
- Comment The power of wind power.
December 2008
- Sweet P 37 Hours in Providence.
Running with the Rhode Island Hash House Harriers
Josh Wood, Art Director
I was waist deep in murky water when I realized two things. One, that I was glad I wore crappy shoes, and two, rocks are slippery. I had the cassette recorder in one hand and my car key in the other and held both above the surface of the water as I forded the stream. There was a shriek ahead of me and Shine On started to fall backwards as if in slow motion. I managed to keep her from falling into the lukewarm murk while saving my tape recorder from going under as well.
Shine On is a grandmother and a Hash House Harrier of a dozen plus years. She’s got battle wounds to prove it. “I’ve got still a scar on my upper right thigh. I sliced it open on a rock. I still have numbness – and that was eight years ago.”
I wasn’t really sure what to expect when I took off with the hashers behind Burrillville Middle School to the sound of a beat up hunting horn. I had read a little bit www.half-mind.com/Hashing/who.htm about the history of the Hash House Harriers running club. It was started by an English chartered accountant and his fellow ex-pats in Malaysia in the 1930s. Based on an old schoolyard game of hares and hounds, designated “hares” get a head start to mark a trail while the “hounds” track them down. Their biggest change to the game was the introduction of beer and general debauchery. The original 1938 charter harrier.net/presskit/shistory.html went something like this:
- To promote physical fitness among our members
- To get rid of weekend hangovers
- To acquire a good thirst and to satisfy it in beer
- To persuade the older members that they are not as old as they feel
Since then, the Hash Houses have grown to an estimated 1,700 clubs around the world. Hares in the modern Hash Houses use flour, chalk or paper to mark a trail. A good trail has plenty of false leads, which keeps the pack guessing and keeps the hounds together regardless of their athleticism. Today’s Rhode Island Hash featured a “live hare,” Basket Boom Boom. A “live hare” means both hare and hounds were on the trail simultaneously. It’s an added bonus, Shine On explained, because upon catching the hare, the hounds earn the privilege of de-pantsing him.
It’s all a little disorienting for a virgin (a hasher’s term for a first timer). Hashing is infused with it’s own language and culture, and the hashers have handles like Amish Ithead, Fuwangii Boner, Swamp Whine, Async, and Dr. Who. The fast runners are referred to as front running bastards, the phrase “are you?” is yelled to the front running bastards to see if a path has been found, and “on-on” is shouted back when a trail is confirmed. In the course of an hour, our trail cut through rocky logging trails, thorny underbrush, industrial sites piled with palettes and odd debris, sapling-choked thickets, gravelly roadsides, streams and wet places of questionable water quality, and backyards. Nothing is truly off limits, and wild places, referred to as shiggy, is the preferred terrain of the Hash. Visiting Boston hasher, The Fat One, showed his prize from a recent hash. Both of his forearms glowed scarlet with poison ivy. Meanwhile, calls of “on-on” and “are you?” echoed from the dozen or so hashers searching for marks in the undergrowth, as I worried about how many ticks I’d picked up through the last patch of tall grass.
I’m not exactly sure how long the run was, but eventually I came to a clearing in the woods where the front running bastards had gathered around containers of homebrew, pouring the dark ale into red plastic cups. Bondo Jovi is the designated brewer. “The Rhode Island Hash started 20 years ago – I wasn’t one of the founders, actually, myself and Basket are pretty much the originals from 20 years ago.” Apparently Bondo’s basement is fitted with enough brewing equipment to keep Bavaria buzzed for the next 100 years. As runners arrived, the group distributed the beer and immediately broke out into a medley about hair, S&M and bodily functions. Shine On explains that each Hash is different, and the Rhode Island Hash has a particular soft spot for home brew and song.
I recorded some of medley, but the Hash wasn’t exactly comfortable with my tape recorder. Last week two hares from the New Haven Hash were picked up by Connecticut authorities http://www.nhregister.com when the flour they were using to set trail in an Ikea parking lot was mistaken for Anthrax. So no one was really sure if I really was just a half-assed blogger, or an agent of Homeland Security. Hashing occasionally attracts the attention of the general public. “Sometimes we just tell people we’re running for Jesus,” Shine On added.
Post run, everyone met at Basket Boom Boom’s house for the circle and the on-in. The circle is an alcohol-infused ceremony and recap of the run. The hare’s work is graded by each hound, virgins and visitors are called out, and down-downs are assigned. A down-down is the ceremonial chugging of beverages; considered a reward or penalty, depending upon your point of view. Most importantly, the circle provides an opportunity for more beer and song. The on-in follows, which is basically another opportunity for beer and song. “Interesting things happen at the on-in,” mentioned the Friar, who told of some of the legendary on-ins of the past. He wasn’t kidding.
Rhode Island hashes happen every Monday at 6:30 PM. Check the Rhode Island Hash House Harriers Web rih3.com site to try the next one. And virgins, remember to bring crappy shoes and a change of clothes. And most importantly, never, ever, pass out at the on-in.
